Graceful like Fall
By: G Wayne
Copyright © 10/01/07
To become religious grade, Riley needed to have worn the underwear for seven days and
nights while seeking enlightenment in a steam cabinet. During these fruitless attempts at
spiritual regeneration, the only things Riley would eat were scrambled eggs and worms.
Anyway, people would slowly make their way to the altar, or snack bar when they used the
bowling alley. Stinkhorn would open the cooler and remove a plastic bag containing Riley's
unmentionables. He would hold them at an arms length and open one corner of the bag and
pass it in front of a line of people. They didn't have to be too close because this was powerful
stuff. It took at least twenty ushers to catch people as they passed out. They carried some back
to their chairs, and helped others into the restroom so they could throw up. Some people
would go into comas for weeks, which would be embarrassing to their families, and also
expensive. This ceremony was later termed "Skivvie Sniffing", and a law was quickly enacted
against it. All violators would be sentenced to have their nose supper glued shut. But did that
stop them!? No ... medical Hairfoot clinics sprang up all over, clamming cures for all sorts of
Zach and Highlo became concerned when they noticed that Riley was becoming exceedingly
depressed. It seemed the more money he made, the deeper he slipped into despair. When he
would bother to get out of bed, he would mope around the castle all day not talking to anyone.
If anyone would try to talk to him, he would let out a dejected sigh and just walk away. Highlo
bought him a dog but it ran away. Zach took him to a psychiatrist but after only two hours of
listening to Riley go on about how sad life was, the psychiatrist politely excused himself from
the room and committed suicide. Zach was at the end of his rope. He put his hands on Riley's
shoulders and Riley could see deep concern and anguish on his friend's face. They stood there
for a long time. "What do we do now?" was all Zach said.
~ ================ ~
A touch of the winter winds slipped through the leaves of the trees as the sun set over the
castle turrets. They were topped with strange shaped cupolas clad in copper, which had
developed a thick deposit of verdigris over the years. It left them gild in an ominous dark
green that turned to gray and faded to black at that time of day, when the sun sank away and
allowed the darkness to culture all things evil.
After only a short time of being free of contamination and regaining its reputation as a
sanctuary for the community, the castle slipped back into the abysmal dismal depths of
avoidance. The disease that formerly plagued the castle returned with a vengeance killing all
the livestock on the castle grounds. People were immune to this reemergence, but nobody
knew this but the Polyps and Riley. And they were not telling. They realized that people were
liability and what they got in return was just not worth it. Riley was still considered a deity,
but was left him alone because nobody seemed to feel it was worth risking death, just to catch
Riley Hairfoot was happier now but he was in pain...from eating too many pork chops from the
mass extinction of local livestock.
Highlo and Zach sat arm in arm enjoying another sunset.
"It's sort of quiet lately," remarked Highlo as she gazed over the empty courtyard.
Zach smiled and nodded his head, "Yes it is my dear...could I interest you in some more pot
Wobble rolled around in the grass. He moaned because he was so stuffed full of food, meat
mainly. He was swollen in the middle and stringy on either end, looking just like a jumbo
Zuzu was as happy as she could be, still enjoying the novelty of being a newlywed. After
many attempts at serious relationships, she finally found true love with Riley. Who would
Oh yes ... everybody lived happily ever after.